Diminish the Power of the Past with Hypnosis

I have often spoken of the severe changes in personality that happen when confronting trauma from the past. In this discourse, I will discuss moving from living in the pain of the past to “Living in Truth and Power.”

Diminishing the Power of the Past using hypnosis

Being affected by the past is not a mental health disorder; however, the power of the past can impact the way you think and believe, especially about yourself, causing problems functioning in everyday life. The issues may include self-image, difficulty managing emotions and behavior, and a pattern of unstable positive thoughts about Self, which ultimately will affect your performance in everyday life.

My Story about Diminishing the Power of the Past as a practitioner of hypnosis

I grew up in a maelstrom of disfunction and trauma. Therefore, my adult life, though try as I may, always seemed to reflect the stain of the past. However, as I am now nearing 60, it is not the deep past that affects me most. Most of the deep past I’ve worked out. The past that has changed my self image the most is from the more recent past. 

Four years ago, I was feeling on top of the world. I was a part of a large ministry in charge of the music of a New Thought church in beautiful Fort Lauderdale. I felt loved, guided and protected by God’s love in every way. Every week, I sensed a tremendous surge of love coming from all sides of me, from the congregants, the people who working working with me for me, and even family had been incredibly supportive. I also had another ministry called “Spiritual Warriors,”  that was very much a strong place of connection. This group was at the same church where I was music minister, a church that was said to have been based in Love and New Thought, I believed with all of my heart was true.

The minister and I got along very well from the moment we met, before he had taken over this church.  However, many people warned me that this particular minister was known for being difficult to work with and, to some people, quite the opposite of good. Like most narcissists, he treated the people he needed the most with great affection, tough. In fact, I had taken a few classes toward actually becoming a minister, as I was seriously considering that path as a new direction in my life.

So, when this minister called me and asked me to come to lunch as my Christmas gift past (it was January), I was eager to see him and laugh, as we always did. But, what happened was quite the contrary. 

After we had ordered, his disposition changed from jolly to stern. Without much preparation he said to me: “I have to tell you, I’m not happy with you and your position at the church. You disobeyed the one request I asked for New Years. (This request was to have as special music a song called “I hate New Years.” Maybe it was called, “I hate Christmas.” Either way, I thought he was joking. As I listened to the song, I couldn’t imagine why any minister would want that song on the holidays. However, after his first request, he never mentioned it again until that moment.) 

So, I did disobey his request, but as I said, I told him I thought he was joking. He said, “I was not.” He clasped his hands in front of him tightly. “In fact, I’m led to believe by some people very close to you that you can’t play the piano or sing. What exactly can you do?” (However, looking back, at that same lunch he also offered me a raise and asked me to go to a private teaching session with his favorite music minister for some advice about moving forward as a better music minister. So, his intent wasn’t to fire me, but to manipulate my thinking, so that he could get what he needed from me. I had seen him do this to other people, so I was ready to walk away from the job that I loved so much. And I did that weekend.)

I hate to admit this, but I let this abusive preacher’s words go much deeper than I had ever imagined. Soon after that incident, I wrote a letter to the church Board (which, by that time, was filled with people he had hand picked), explaining what the minister had said to me and why I stepped down from my position. No admonishment took place. I did find out later that our lead singer whom we had hired together and whom he wanted to fire at least 3 times for complacency was actually the person who had “been close” and threw me under the bus.) 

At that time I was getting paid $200 a week for a job that probably took 15 hours of my time a week and plenty more more during holidays. Quitting my ministerial job there released me to get many other amazing jobs as a pianist, singer and actor. The first job I attained was playing the piano for one of the most prestigious country clubs in South Florida, at Indian Creek Country Club, getting paid 2x what I got paid at the church for only 2 1/2 hours of my time and talent. I also began singing and acting and getting paid, sometimes, thousands after I left the church. In other words, quitting that job released me to do bigger and more wonderful things in my life. I should be thanking that minister for pushing me out.

I had even written a solo show that quickly got picked up by booking agents, where I played the piano and sang on stage; dancing, singing, playing the Standards derived from Broadway. Currently, after years not even going to a church, I’m also getting paid more than that job for singing a total of 2 1/2 hours a week and get paid even more when I substitute as the pianist. 

This may all sound like I’m patting myself on the back or over-compensating to make myself feel justified for walking away from the music ministry. However, actually all of this was to prove to myself and maybe to the demon voice of the past that I am quite good enough. But, it turns out that it wasn’t even that had caused me to over-achieve. Every time I sat down to play the piano or stood to sing, I would have a moment of fear because of those words he spoke. What if I am not good enough? 

I don’t often watch any performances I do as an artist, because I’m far too critical of myself. But, this morning I sat down to watch this past Sunday’s service on YouTube. Because of the Covid virus, the church videotapes all of the services and uploads them live to YouTube. This past weekend I was substituting as the director, which meant for this traditional church, I had to play a prelude and a postlude on the piano. As I watched myself play the prelude, I began to tear up.  I carefully watched my hands glide through the beautiful music, without a glitch. I heard emotion, joy, love, expertise, and spirit in every note I played. I realized—in that moment—that I am good enough. At 60 and having had standing ovations all over the world, I still didn’t believe until this moment, this morning, that I still had enough talent as an older man to sustain the attention of an audience, even though I had continued to work as an artist ever since leaving the church. Until I was able to judge for myself that my talent and my heart were just perfect as I am, I never received God’s healing grace to my heart, mind and soul.

The next morning, I talked to a lovely minister friend who lives upstairs. We pray together a few times a week and encourage the best from each other. I shared this story with her. I asked her what she thought of me sending a letter to that minister. She told me that I should write the letter, but not send it. Her reasoning was because the problem and the issue was mine, not the minister whom she said had “spiritually abused me.” She felt a letter to this man was actually yet another cry for his approval. She said that the letter would be a waste of time on him. 

As I see now, for a narcissist, he would have taken the letter as a pat on the back for a job well-done. I don’t know for sure, but I have heard people tell me that he regrets what happened between us. I do believe that. I helped build that church, and there wasn’t a soul in that church that I didn’t love, even when it got too large for me to know everyone.  

Ultimately, we all reflect a bit too much on our past. Today, I’m thanking God for my past, which has caused me and urged me forward to be the healing practitioner that I am today. Of course, I can add to that now … which has also made me the polished professional artist I am today. 

This moment is about healing from the most recent past—completely and unequivocally. Practitioners must practice what they preach.  I, too, have fallen prey to someone’s negative words about myself. These words were used as a sharp blade to injure my soul and hinder me from creating a future free of the past. I now release myself from those words and send forgiveness and thanks to myself and to all of the people who have helped me move to this amazing place in my life and career.

With 31 years of experience and a great office in beautiful Fort Lauderdale, Hypnosis on Las Olas has created clear path to health for many people in South Florida. I will help put you on the road to peace and keep you there, so that you may rewrite your story daily, as in my book: “Your New Story, Your New Life.”

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